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Thread: coping with it all
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October 19th, 2014, 04:37 PM #11
I totally understand trust me. I get comments all the time. It really surprises me how rude people can be.
It was really hard for me a couple of years ago when my sister had a girl. Here she was with 3 boys not married had a fling with a 20 year old kid. Mind you she's 42. Makes me sick. And was drinking like a fish and smoking. Quit drinking when she was pregnant but still smoked. Why is it she got a girl and I try so hard to eat right don't smoke or drink and I have 6 boys? But on the flip side I do love them all and can't imagine my life without any of them! But would be soooo nice to have a daughter.
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October 21st, 2014, 03:16 PM #12Dream Vet
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October 28th, 2014, 05:45 AM #13
I often have people ask if the kids are all mine!!!
Mom to 11 years 9 years 5 years and HT2 years Thanks GD
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October 29th, 2014, 01:54 PM #14
Before DH and any thought of babies...I was that cad. My girlfriend had 4 boys, and although I never said anything as awful as "are they all your DH's" I did make comments about 4 boys. Like, "Are you going to try for a girl?" But mostly it I was just so incredulous. Like, "4 boys, that really is incredible!". In hindsight that probably stung, and after I began researching swaying for DS, and reading all the GD stories, I actually hooked up with her one night and apologized. But she really wasn't offended at all (well, she says) and said that she got so used to the comments that they didn't even phase her anymore.
I know you'll never get "used" to the comments the jerks of the world make, but you have to let them bounce off. Accept the fact that most people just don't get how offensive they are. You are better than them!Sept 2008 & successful boy sway June 2010.
M/C Oct 2012
Is DE in my future?
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November 1st, 2014, 10:35 AM #15Swaying Advice Coach
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Yes we should always keep in mind that most people do not mean anything by their offhand remarks, they are probably just not sure what to say and saying the first thing that pops into their mind.
I said a couple things to an unmarried friend of mine (and I did it not once, but TWICE) that I really regret and it was totally because I was nervous and not sure what to say and just blurted out something that in retrospect, I know was probably hurtful (I am a much smoother writer than talker!!). And I don't even THINK in the way that my comment indicated. Jeez, I WISH I was unmarried many times and am actually kind of jealous of the freedom she has, YK??!!! Questions?? Check out the NEW and improved Complete Index !!!
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November 12th, 2014, 11:56 AM #16
People just don't think sometimes, or they think they are saying things that help, not realizing how hurtful or how much they can sting. I had a stranger at a restaurant one time come up to me, lean in, and say in my ear (with all my boys present) - I'm so sorry, I know how you feel - my daughter has three boys too. Really?!?!? Yes, having three boys is challenging, but I guarantee my oldest has more daily drama than do most girls his age. It is not just about dirt and noise that is boys. But, I guess people assume with multiple boys mom must have her hands full and with multiple girls dad must own a shotgun - just steryotypes. But it's hard NOT to remember the things that are said to you like that.
Married to my High School Sweetheart.
14 10 3 and our miracle (3/7/16)
Last sway for ended with a beautiful baby .
Surprise BFP Sept 2013...Ended in (D&C 11/19/13 - No HB at 11 weeks)
Tried each month with no success at pregnancy on our own from 12/13-9/14. Moved on with RE.
IUI #1 with Injectables 10/17/14 = BFN at 14 DPIUI
IUI #2 with Injectables 11/14/14 = BFN at 11 DPIUI
FET "Baby Stella" 3/17/15 = BFP betas 22,44,51,52...CP :
Donor Embryo Attempt 2 - FET 7/10/15 - BFP!!
Betas...10 p5dt = 177
12 dp5dt = 534 (30.1 hours doubling time!)
14 dp5dt = 1339 (36.2 hours doubling time!)
17 dp5dt = 3993 (45.7 hours doubling time!)
21 dp5dt = 5839 (175 hours doubling time)...trying to be positive...HRC suggested that both implanted and one didn't make it...had pink spotting on 19dp5dt please don't leave us yet little one.
23 dp5dt = 12,292!
28 dp5dt = 29,504
1 Beautiful seen at 6w3d (measuring 6w1d) 123 bpm! Heartbeat seen again at 8w3d 180 bpm!
Anatomy Scan at 17 weeks shows a happy and healthy little girl!
"Life is not what it's supposed to be. It's what it is. The way you cope with it is what makes the difference." Virginia Satir
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November 12th, 2014, 11:58 PM #17Dream Vet
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It so bugs me when I get the "you must have your hands full... especially with boys." Grr! I know someone with 3 boys and a girl and she reckons the girl makes her pull her hair out more than her three boys combined. It is temprement, not gender that makes a kid 'hard' or not
DPs sons 21 +13 11 + our 6 4 year old identical twins!
I might actually be over my deep yearning for a and it's an exciting feeling
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