Moms of 4 of a kind - how bad was GD with #4?

[maidentomother]

Hugs Lace. I cut off contact with my mom several times but the last time completely, 4 years ago. Even when I heard she dying this January supposedly, I didn't want to make contact. Now she's dead and there's no chance for her to ever change....though I highly doubt she would have done anything except get worse.

Brava for you to breaking the cycle. My mom was abused physically and emotionally by both parents, grandma was a cold, distant woman and grandpa a sexist violent alcoholic. I mostly pitied her these past several years. She was a miserable, lonely, delusional harpy.

[LacePrincess]

Hugs Lace. I cut off contact with my mom several times but the last time completely, 4 years ago. Even when I heard she dying this January supposedly, I didn't want to make contact. Now she's dead and there's no chance for her to ever change....though I highly doubt she would have done anything except get worse.

Brava for you to breaking the cycle. My mom was abused physically and emotionally by both parents, grandma was a cold, distant woman and grandpa a sexist violent alcoholic. I mostly pitied her these past several years. She was a miserable, lonely, delusional harpy.

Thanks maiden. I'm sorry your mom was dysfunctional too. My mom also grew up in an emotionally abusive household, so, definitely a cycle.

For me I'm much angrier at my enabler dad than at my mom - she was and is fundamentally broken and never had normal psychological or emotional responses. My dad, otoh, was just a coward.

Anyways I only managed to break things off because I saw her repeating the abusive pattern pitting MY kids against each other, and I did it for the sake of my boys. Otherwise I doubt I would ever have been able to finally put my foot down. Terrifying, but totally worth the freedom!

[hopper]

Reading all these I wonder if the worst GD comes from when we really are believing the baby is a certain gender. When I TTC my 3rd son I had NO gender preference at all, could envision it being a boy or a girl. I tried to do Shettles but not very hard. It was just all the symptoms and the Chinese Gender Predictor that made me start thinking girl, girl, girl and it was like he usurped her position LOL.

I also know of several people who had HG and everyone said "oh it's a girl" and also people who had incorrect ultrasounds and they also had really severe GD. So it makes me wonder if you're accepting of the possibility going it maybe it's easier???

THIS THIS THIS!!! I had no preference on my first but OWTs and gender predictors and the fact I had HG so heard "Its definitely a girl!" a bajillion times throughout the nine months of being on Team Green had me FULL sure I was having a girl. That moment my son was born...I swear it was the biggest shock I ever got in my life. It took me the best part of 3 months to properly bond with him, and I feel I compensate with him still to this day because of that. But he was a stranger to me when he was born, I expected a daughter and had bonded with my imaginary daughter and then out popped a son. It was mind boggling. I didn't go Team Green on my second son and had no issues bonding with him, my PPD has been a lot less severe this time and I am just happier but the GD is still there. I honestly think if I hadn't listened to people guesses on gender when pg with DS1 I might not have GD right now. I wonder what a life without GD would feel like, I hate to live like this and wouldn't wish it on anyone. My friend had her DD this past week and while I was happy both she and the baby were ok I couldn't help feeling smug that she was hollering for pain relief before she hit 2cm dilated....I'm a spiteful witch!!!!!