Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 12
Results 11 to 20 of 20
  1. #11
    Dream Vet

    Join Date
    Jul 2014
    Posts
    742
    Post Thanks / Like
    Downloads
    0
    Uploads
    0
    I'm 15w now and we haven't told anyone, except 2 close friends. The reason is exactly what you say. The comments... especially by my DH's family who only care for boys and having a girl is just unfortunate let's say....Imagine 3 girls. I really would love a boy but a healthy baby is above all. That's why we decided to announce the pregnancy along with gender so that I can put up with their comments (for sure they will be let down by me that I haven't been able to produce a male offspring to their son) only once... I would flip if every time I met them they would make comments about baby's possible gender. I honestly wouldn't handle 7 months of them saying "Oh let's hope this time you made it and this is a boy". I wish healthy pregnancy and delivery to all of us!!!!
    (2005) (2008) TTCBLUE 2015

    It's a girl!!!


  2. Likes Throwaway_panther liked this post
  3. #12
    Dream Vet
    Throwaway_panther's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2016
    Location
    U.S.
    Posts
    2,224
    Post Thanks / Like
    Blog Entries
    2
    Downloads
    0
    Uploads
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by pink_bean View Post
    Throw_away Panther, if it's any consolation I have also suffered similarily to you and have a lot of the same feelings about life as a girl/woman. But I still wanted a daughter very much for many reasons including having a "do over" of sorts. Meaning protecting and loving a daughter in the way that I wasn't. I understand your fears. I think as parents though we are terrified our children will suffer the things we did as kids. Even with my boys, I have a terrible fear they will be bullied or not accepted. I worry they will be taken advantage of by people or obviously worse things. I know it's hard now but I believe it will be different for you once she's here. Your fears won't go away completely but maybe raising her can help to heal you from all you suffered.
    This really reached me. I can't thank you enough pink_bean ♡

    Sent from my SCH-I545 using Tapatalk

  4. Likes pink_bean liked this post
  5. #13
    Swaying Advice Coach
    atomic sagebrush's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Location
    Eastern Washington State, USA
    Posts
    108,134
    Post Thanks / Like
    Downloads
    0
    Uploads
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by Throwaway_panther View Post
    Thank you! I won't be telling anyone prior though -- I'm actually not sure I get why I would? I won't be having to tell people over and over... they'll know by announcement or when they actually meet my baby!

    Sent from my SCH-I545 using Tapatalk
    It's because you have a lot going on at that point in time and may not be up for dealing with other people's bullshit. Better for them to know ahead of time and then no one is coming in saying "oh I was so sure you were having a boy" when you need to be 110% on task for taking care of your new daughter.
    !!! Questions?? Check out the NEW and improved Complete Index !!!

    If you appreciate my help with your sway plan, please consider a donation:

    https://www.paypal.com/donate?hosted_button_id=C92U9TVWTRTDQ

  6. Likes aussiesmiler liked this post
  7. #14
    Dream Vet
    Throwaway_panther's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2016
    Location
    U.S.
    Posts
    2,224
    Post Thanks / Like
    Blog Entries
    2
    Downloads
    0
    Uploads
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by atomic sagebrush View Post
    It's because you have a lot going on at that point in time and may not be up for dealing with other people's bullshit. Better for them to know ahead of time and then no one is coming in saying "oh I was so sure you were having a boy" when you need to be 110% on task for taking care of your new daughter.
    Ah, I hadn't thought about it that way. Part of me feels solace (and even joy) being able to go afterwards, "See! How you carry and other OWT are NOT scientific!" Especially when, if asked, I coyly say, "I think it's a girl." I've been told to my face, "Nope." Only one of my SIL thinks it's a girl now because I think she's on to me, haha.

    I don't know. I processed this topic over the last few days. I will definitely keep the sex to myself until perhaps the last minute -- I'm hoping the joy you all keep saying comes with a baby will carry me through any dumb comments post-birth.

    Sent from my SCH-I545 using Tapatalk

  8. Likes atomic sagebrush liked this post
  9. #15
    Swaying Advice Coach
    atomic sagebrush's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Location
    Eastern Washington State, USA
    Posts
    108,134
    Post Thanks / Like
    Downloads
    0
    Uploads
    0
    I will tell you, I have had that same experience not only with pregnancy but with LOTS of other things in life. It is an art form to decide, "I am going to allow other people to be wrong" because no one likes that chick that goes around saying "I told you so." (Trust me. Hermione Granger has nothing on me.) Every time it happens, try to tell yourself you are cultivating a more mature and superior attitude where you allow other people to simply be wrong and blissful in their fog of incorrectness - instead of taking it as a personal affront that you must correct, imagine that you are graciously allowing them the joy of thinking that they are right for a while and then the arrival of the baby herself will disabuse them of any notion otherwise. It is a gift that you give to them. I have found repeatedly that people will believe what they believe and all the evidence in the world will not sway them until such a point in time as they are ready to be swayed. and that's ok - just remember it reflects on them, and you are made of teflon and it doesn't touch you. You give them the gift of wrongness.
    !!! Questions?? Check out the NEW and improved Complete Index !!!

    If you appreciate my help with your sway plan, please consider a donation:

    https://www.paypal.com/donate?hosted_button_id=C92U9TVWTRTDQ

  10. Thanks Throwaway_panther thanked for this post
    Likes maidentomother liked this post
  11. #16
    Dream Vet
    Boom's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2014
    Location
    London, UK
    Posts
    907
    Post Thanks / Like
    Downloads
    0
    Uploads
    0
    We didn't even tell our parents about this pregnancy till we knew it was a girl. After our daughter died last year I just couldn't have dealt with ANY speculation this time with a brave smile.
    1st Marriage 1999 2002
    2nd Marriage 2008 2011
    #1 Dogus N Cyprus BFN
    HT July -Aug 2015 - Too beautiful for this world
    Sep 2015 FET at Clinic R CZ BFN
    Due July 2016 with a rainbow natural conception

  12. #17
    Swaying Advice Coach
    atomic sagebrush's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Location
    Eastern Washington State, USA
    Posts
    108,134
    Post Thanks / Like
    Downloads
    0
    Uploads
    0
    I did not tell anyone I was pregnant till I knew it was a girl, either. Just didn't want the stress over the speculation.
    !!! Questions?? Check out the NEW and improved Complete Index !!!

    If you appreciate my help with your sway plan, please consider a donation:

    https://www.paypal.com/donate?hosted_button_id=C92U9TVWTRTDQ

  13. Likes netti02, Throwaway_panther liked this post
  14. #18
    Dream Vet
    Throwaway_panther's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2016
    Location
    U.S.
    Posts
    2,224
    Post Thanks / Like
    Blog Entries
    2
    Downloads
    0
    Uploads
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by atomic sagebrush View Post
    I will tell you, I have had that same experience not only with pregnancy but with LOTS of other things in life. It is an art form to decide, "I am going to allow other people to be wrong" because no one likes that chick that goes around saying "I told you so." (Trust me. Hermione Granger has nothing on me.) Every time it happens, try to tell yourself you are cultivating a more mature and superior attitude where you allow other people to simply be wrong and blissful in their fog of incorrectness - instead of taking it as a personal affront that you must correct, imagine that you are graciously allowing them the joy of thinking that they are right for a while and then the arrival of the baby herself will disabuse them of any notion otherwise. It is a gift that you give to them. I have found repeatedly that people will believe what they believe and all the evidence in the world will not sway them until such a point in time as they are ready to be swayed. and that's ok - just remember it reflects on them, and you are made of teflon and it doesn't touch you. You give them the gift of wrongness.
    I don't think I could like a post more. Thank you atomic!! (And haha, boy do I feel you on the Hermione comment... )

    Sent from my SCH-I545 using Tapatalk

  15. Likes atomic sagebrush liked this post
  16. #19
    Big Dreamer
    Lissastick's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2016
    Location
    Southern California
    Posts
    283
    Post Thanks / Like
    Downloads
    0
    Uploads
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by Throwaway_panther View Post
    So I know I'm the minority on these boards, so I apologize if I upset anyone: just know in advance, I am pregnant with a girl... but I really, really wanted a boy. Still struggle with really wanting a boy. It's our first child, and we plan to have more, but I (thought it might seem crazy) have a lot of fears of my husband being older/getting older, my thyroid issues can rear up at any time, etc.

    Though we know the sex, only a handful of people know with us -- partially because I didn't feel strong enough to deal with ANY comments on the sex, and also because (a bit selfishly), we've been told that going gender neutral before the baby shower = you getting stuff you actually need vs. cute clothes.

    Well, because I keep telling people, "it's a surprise!" they all try to guess. I have not gotten a single girl guess.

    EVERYBODY thinks I'm having a boy -- based on how I'm carrying, based on my cravings, based on my hair, based on my PERSONALITY (I guess that whole "Martha" thing carries over in general), based on my husband (manly man~). I feel very confident that my next pregnancies will never rely on OWT based on how this one's gone, that's for sure! In fact, the closest guess to me having a girl was one of my sister's sarcastically going, "All of your stuff points boy -- it'll probably be a girl."

    Part of me sometimes feels like being able to shock everyone with a girl will be appealing, but these comments make me feel so... wrong. Like I agree with them, "Yes, this SHOULD be a boy -- I wanted a boy!" Which is so horrible to think of my poor future daughter. And I've even had a few people go, "What do you want? You want a boy, don't you?" Like I'm so transparently a "boy mom," yet I'm having a girl?

    I don't know -- I don't know how to feel when I constantly here, "I think it's a boy!" I do know that I'm glad I found out the sex, because having all of these guesses would make me more confident it'd be a boy, and I'd probably be WAY more upset at delivery.
    This sounds EXACTLY what I am going through...except I really want a girl. But *everyone* keeps telling me that I'm having a boy. And I want to believe them because if I tell myself they are wrong, and I found out everyone is right, I think I will crumble into a ball. And I'm thinking my GD will be 1,000 times worse because I just want to prove everyone wrong and tell the world that I've got my girl! I feel like I can't make girls. I know that isn't true. But, this baby is our last as my husband said NO to a third child. And really, I've always only wanted two children as well.

    I have been flirting the idea that it's a girl, but, I keep stopping myself from thinking that because if/when I find out it's another boy, I will not be as upset.

    This is just so hard. I really wish I didn't feel this way. My husband says he has no preference. I wish I could be like that!!!!
    DS 1 Born August 2013
    DS 2 (Due May 15th, 2017)

  17. Likes atomic sagebrush liked this post
  18. #20
    Dream Vet
    Throwaway_panther's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2016
    Location
    U.S.
    Posts
    2,224
    Post Thanks / Like
    Blog Entries
    2
    Downloads
    0
    Uploads
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by Lissastick View Post
    This sounds EXACTLY what I am going through...except I really want a girl. But *everyone* keeps telling me that I'm having a boy. And I want to believe them because if I tell myself they are wrong, and I found out everyone is right, I think I will crumble into a ball. And I'm thinking my GD will be 1,000 times worse because I just want to prove everyone wrong and tell the world that I've got my girl! I feel like I can't make girls. I know that isn't true. But, this baby is our last as my husband said NO to a third child. And really, I've always only wanted two children as well.

    I have been flirting the idea that it's a girl, but, I keep stopping myself from thinking that because if/when I find out it's another boy, I will not be as upset.

    This is just so hard. I really wish I didn't feel this way. My husband says he has no preference. I wish I could be like that!!!!
    This is what I was referencing to you in your thread!

    I think you should find out the sex when you can to overcome those external comments. But just as you saw: plenty thought I was having a boy and I had a girl. Even after this thread I'd have complete strangers go, "Having a boy?"

    Sent from my SM-G930V using Tapatalk

  19. Likes atomic sagebrush, Lissastick liked this post
Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 12

Similar Threads

  1. 13+2 tech thinks boy but I'm not convinced...
    By Amberjsq14 in forum Ultrasound Gender Prediction
    Replies: 18
    Last Post: October 22nd, 2014, 04:56 PM
  2. Sonogram thinks boy but not confirmed? Anyone have any idea ?
    By Machin29 in forum Ultrasound Gender Prediction
    Replies: 14
    Last Post: February 20th, 2014, 05:02 PM
  3. Any gender predictions? :) I'm dying to know what everyone thinks lol
    By Expectingbaby2 in forum Ultrasound Gender Prediction
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: October 15th, 2013, 06:22 AM
  4. Ok ..,I thinks it's time!!
    By ams in forum Trying to Conceive a Boy
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: April 11th, 2011, 11:47 PM

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •