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  1. #1
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    3SmittensBOGOKittens's Avatar
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    Angry Do You Believe In Karma? Good People Get What They Deserve?!?

    I've been absolutely struggling lately. When I was growing up, I truly believed that "good" people got justly rewarded, and "bad" people would always lose in the end. Unfortunately though, when it comes to gender desire and also other situations, I have seen time after time where people who try to do everything right, are good moms, etc, still struggle with family balancing (and getting the gender they want so badly.) I have also seen a LOT of moms in my local moms groups who always seem to be mean to other moms, don't handle things well, are selfish, competitive, etc... and yet they seem to float through life easily and ALWAYS get what they want.

    For example, I know someone who is VERY abusive toward her kids, but still has a "perfect" boy and girl. Or DOZENS of moms who didn't even try to sway and who were very careless about TTC, even right after a miscarriage, and still got the gender they desired.

    I am not thinking clearly right now, 'cause of the hormones and RAGE that I'm experiencing in the TWW. I also know someone who was pregnant and purposefully drank alcohol before their miscarriage was even confirmed, not once but 3 times, and who refuses to take progesterone supplements to support pregnancy or even to participate in recurrent pregnancy loss testing... and still keeps getting pregnant over and over again.

    So sorry that this is soooo long, but my question is - do you believe in karma? Do you believe that if we do good deeds, really try to make a difference in the world, that we will wind up with the desires of our hearts? Will the people who don't even respect life or who are extremely evil still continue to get desired genders? Or do you think that it is still totally up to chance or science?
    We finally gave our 3 boys TWIN sisters!! so our full house is complete!!!

  2. #2
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    I believe in Karma in a couple of different ways. I believe that in this life time the kind of person you are can influence what comes back to you but only because you end up surrounding yourself with the same kind of people. Kind people eventually weed out the nasty ones and nasty ones end up with other nasty ones because the kind ones don't stick around long term. But the kind of karma you are talking about, I believe happens over numerous life times. I believe our souls are taught lessons and we return to face the consequences of our past wrong doings or to be rewarded for past good deeds. I have to believe it's bigger than one life time because otherwise it just isn't fair.
    Hope that makes sense.
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  3. #3
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    I don't believe there is anyone watching your every move to count the total + Karma points - the negative ones, then working out the equivilant "prize" for your points. And who is to say what is good and what is bad? Too much grey area for me to believe in Karma.

  4. #4
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    I used to but don't know any more... I've seen people ruder/meaner than me get given everything they want on a plate (job, house, children) but not appreciate it as much. DH and I have had more major struggles and still have less. Perhaps they have different values.

    My dad was a teacher and a kind person. He was a great dad who I adored. He had a happy marriage, worked hard for holidays, 4 daughters. He died at age 57 from cancer. Some might say karma rewarded him with his family, etc. Others might say he didn't get enough time, didn't get to see his daughters grow up or marry or have children, never had a son... its perspective.

    I guess what one might value another might not. And at the end of it it only comes down to contentment/happiness... someone can be happy with a worse lot in life

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  5. #5
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    I don't see it as karma as far as gender is concerned. I just think that for some reason I was meant to have 5 daughters, even if right now I don't understand the reason. Maybe it was so that I had a large family...because if I had one of each I would of stopped at 2 children. I think that this is just the way is meant to be...
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  6. #6
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    I don't think theres an outer force balancing things out, but I do believe that horrible people do eventually get whats coming to them and good people will at some point be recognized for being good. ie The bully will always eventually be stood up to by someone and made to feel very small

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by rainbowflower View Post

    My dad was a teacher and a kind person. He was a great dad who I adored. He had a happy marriage, worked hard for holidays, 4 daughters. He died at age 57 from cancer. Some might say karma rewarded him with his family, etc. Others might say he didn't get enough time, didn't get to see his daughters grow up or marry or have children, never had a son... its perspective.

    I guess what one might value another might not. And at the end of it it only comes down to contentment/happiness... someone can be happy with a worse lot in life

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    Well said Rainbowflower. ITA it is perspective.

    I am religious, and I do believe in trials and a purpose in them, but I don't believe in karma. I think many of us can list people we know who "deserve" much better than they have received in life; and vice versa.

  8. #8
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    Karma is really just cause and effect. For every action, there is a reaction. Steve Jobs wrote that you cannot look ahead and connect the dots- you can only do that looking backwards at the end of your journey.

    So, I believe in cause and effect and if that is what Karma really is, then I believe it to be true but you cannot know or understand the reasons for everything looking forward so although it may seem like things didn't work out, you cannot really know that for sure at this moment.

    It's like the energy we put out during the day. Have you ever done something nice for a stranger and didn't say anything? Like, pay their toll or restaurant bill or buy the person behind you a coffee without telling them? You can't help but feel good and smile throughout the day thinking back on it, in turn, the person you helped has a warm and fuzzy feeling all day and puts out a positive vibe- maybe smiles at people that day as he walks past. That is the karma(cause and effect) I believe in. You get back what you put out there. Even if someone has a boy and a girl, that doesn't mean they have a great life. That is just your perception which it based upon your own desires and not that mean lady's actual circumstances. Maybe karma has already slapped her upside the head with a miserable life.

    I don't believe that all our wishes come true just because we are nice people. Bad things happen to wonderful people everyday. That little girl blogger died of brain cancer last week. Did she do something to have bad Karma? Certainly not. She got back a ton of love over this past year though through her blog that she put out there and I am sure she knew how much she was loved when she left this place. It's all how you choose to look at things.
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  9. #9
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    karma is bitch thats bites some people in the ass lol

    I do believe in karma for instance i could be sour that i haven't got my girl but tbh i've got so much more than most a loving husband and beautiful boy i'm a fair person
    my friends and i mean all of them bar one have 1 of each boy and girl yet there husbands didn't stick it out or beat them or are jobless and have no intension of getting a job for there family


    I do believe in god and i do believe he is here to test us and to make us grow wiser with every card we are delt I also believe that we are not given our wishes at will but in time will we be rewarded in full we may not know it now but good things will come i've gotta belive this or whats the point lol
    so im back and


  10. #10
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    Thank you all for your wonderful and insightful responses. I definitely do believe in divine intervention, a higher purpose, destiny, fate, etc... I guess I am just a romantic mushball LOL. I also want to clarify, I don't think it is horrible for a person to have only boys or only girls... I was just down in the dumps because I really think that sometimes bad things happen to good people, and it seems senseless. I know justice doesn't always win out, and good over evil, etc... but I would like to think that there is still hope out there since I have truly tried to live my life to the best of my ability and I am always helping others and doing good deeds and thinking of the greater good. I just feel that I have a lot to offer both my darling sons, AND my treasured future DD.
    We finally gave our 3 boys TWIN sisters!! so our full house is complete!!!

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