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Thread: So upset :'(

  1. #1
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    So upset :'(

    Just found out our last effort to get a girl is gone :'(

    I have two children from a previous relationship, one boy and one girl. My husband also has two from a previous relationship and he has two boys. We already have a boy together. I'm pregnant again and just found out it's another boy. I wanted so much to give my husband the girl I know he wants. I know I already have a girl but I really really wanted one with my husband. His brother just had a baby girl and I feel like they've got what they wanted and they rub it in my husband's face. I'm so upset. I just can't stop crying. Please don't say I shouldn't be because I already have a girl. I feel awful. Don't know what to do :'(

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    Nobody here would say that you may not be upset cause you already have one.
    I think you are a great mom and wife for being devasted cause you wanted to give your DH a daughter. I'm sorry you didn't hear girl.
    But congrats on your Son.
    Mom to

    THX Atomic and gender dreaming forum/members. For your knowledge and support to make our dream come true and family complete!

  3. #3
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    Twins6boysinall's Avatar
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    I do know how it feels to want a girl trust me. I hope you feel better soon. I cried for days when I found out about each of my boys. With the twins I cried my entire pregnancy. But on the up side I do love each and every one of them so very much.

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    Big hugs xx
    2003 - 2005 - 2013
    march 2012 m/c
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    Faith makes things happens

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    Thank you ladies. Everything had told me I was having a girl I did all the old wives tales I could find. Only two pointed to boy. I saw a medium and she said girl. I did the needle and thread test and it said girl - I have never known this to be wrong! I let myself believe this was it :,(

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    I don't think that having your DG necessarily changes the feeling of wanting a certain sex or how it feels after finding out you aren't having what you wanted. Sure, you have one (so do I), but it still is the sense that you are losing the hopes you had for your family and the dream of giving your husband a daughter. I have hopes of giving my daughter a sister, I never had one. But we are pretty certain we are having a third boy. Which is great, but it still means I am losing that dream of her having a sister and I am coping with not being able to provide that for her. Allow yourself time to adjust and keep talking about it until it starts to feel better. Buy a few cute new outfits that are just for him. Think about his name and how much the boys will love having a new little brother to wrangle around with. But don't beat yourself up for your feelings about it. It takes time to get over not getting what you wanted.
    A: "Owner" of the following brood:
    -Our biggest surprise dude (L: 2009)
    -Our rainbow little man (K: 2011)
    -Our sway and pray little diva (J: 2013)
    -Our lucky charm guy (S: 2015)
    We may be done, we may come back for one more sway. Time will tell. At the moment, we are very content with our family!

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    I agree with the above posters. It is very disappointing to not have the DG, but I think it is okay to let yourself have the time and space to grieve the loss of the daughter you had thought you had. Not everyone will understand, but know that you are definitely not alone in how you feel. You have a whole group of people who support you here. Hugs!
    Mom to (2013)
    Got pregnant swaying pink on our 3rd try.
    Fingers crossed for a on June 14, 2015

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    2boysJustOneGirl's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by hotdogz&boyz View Post
    I don't think that having your DG necessarily changes the feeling of wanting a certain sex or how it feels after finding out you aren't having what you wanted. Sure, you have one (so do I), but it still is the sense that you are losing the hopes you had for your family and the dream of giving your husband a daughter. I have hopes of giving my daughter a sister, I never had one. But we are pretty certain we are having a third boy. Which is great, but it still means I am losing that dream of her having a sister and I am coping with not being able to provide that for her. Allow yourself time to adjust and keep talking about it until it starts to feel better. Buy a few cute new outfits that are just for him. Think about his name and how much the boys will love having a new little brother to wrangle around with. But don't beat yourself up for your feelings about it. It takes time to get over not getting what you wanted.
    I just want to say that I have a sister (and a brother) and sisters suck! We don't even speak anymore and I will admit my GD is what fuels some of that. It's complicated but I am truly closer to my brother for many reasons and I think your daughter is blessed to be surrounded by all those boys! You didn't fail her.
    2 baby boys blessed Hoping for a little girl to complete our family
    Angel baby Decemeber 23confirmedand pregnant again nowPlease, please be my little girl!

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    Quote Originally Posted by JakkiGirl View Post
    Just found out our last effort to get a girl is gone :'(

    I have two children from a previous relationship, one boy and one girl. My husband also has two from a previous relationship and he has two boys. We already have a boy together. I'm pregnant again and just found out it's another boy. I wanted so much to give my husband the girl I know he wants. I know I already have a girl but I really really wanted one with my husband. His brother just had a baby girl and I feel like they've got what they wanted and they rub it in my husband's face. I'm so upset. I just can't stop crying. Please don't say I shouldn't be because I already have a girl. I feel awful. Don't know what to do :'(
    One thing I have learned is this: The things that drive GD are unique to everybody and while you do already have one girl, your disappointment is still valid and understandable. It gets easier in time to deal with it all. It helps to not give a lot of thought to what other ppl think or say... Easier said then done! I think if my brother in law was "rubbing salt in my wounds" I would discuss it with him. Tell him how you feel. Maybe he doesn't realize he is hurting you.
    2 baby boys blessed Hoping for a little girl to complete our family
    Angel baby Decemeber 23confirmedand pregnant again nowPlease, please be my little girl!

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    Quote Originally Posted by 2boysJustOneGirl View Post
    I just want to say that I have a sister (and a brother) and sisters suck! We don't even speak anymore and I will admit my GD is what fuels some of that. It's complicated but I am truly closer to my brother for many reasons and I think your daughter is blessed to be surrounded by all those boys! You didn't fail her.
    AGREED! I have 3 sisters, but when it boils down to it, I have don't really have a relationship with my sisters whatsoever! My best friend is way more my sister than my real sisters ever were! My brothers are much easier to get along with!!
    Last edited by Adia; October 28th, 2014 at 07:22 PM.


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