coping strategy that really helped me!!

[myrainbowgirl]

Hi ladies, I am a mom of 4 beautiful boys, and am currently pregnant with #5 (gender unknown). I have a little story to share that might help some of you:

A few months back (before I got pg), I was trying to think of a way to channel my strong desire for a baby girl into something positive, rather than it being this constant emptiness and longing tugging at my heart. I started wondering if I were given the chance to go shopping for a little girl, like REALLY shopping, how it might relieve some of the hurt in my heart. So I looked up some local charities and ministries through my church and contacted them about donating items. Then I went shopping! Went to Babies R Us and went crazy! Then went to a department store and bought a bunch of adorable little outfits. It was sooooo fun, and then afterwards (actually right around the time I conceived), took all the items to the charity and dropped them off. Around Christmas, I am planning to "sponsor" a local little girl and buy gifts. This may be something I do on a regular basis as long as we can afford it. It felt so good to shop, and of course was wonderful to know I was helping someone else in the process!

Now I COMPLETELY understand that not everyone (maybe not even many) would be able to do this financially. In fact, I used my own birthday money to buy some of the items, and at Christmas, will probably have to figure out a way to make it work (probably fewer gifts for myself or asking my boys if they would like to help out a needy child, understanding it may mean a little sacrifice for themselves. I don't think I would force them, but just encourage them).

It was such a positive experience, I just thought sharing it here might have positive impact for both us ladies with GD, but also babies/kids around the world in need. If you decide to do this, consider coming back here to share your story! Would love to hear of some encouraging, uplifting things coming from our GD!

[covered in blue]

Oh wow . That is such a lovely thing to do!!

[Claire33]

That is a very generous thing to do, and I'm glad it's helped your GD! Unfortunately for me, my GD doesn't stem from lack of girly clothes/shopping, but rather the lack of mother-daughter relationship in adulthood. I couldn't care less if my daughter was the biggest tomboy on the block refusing to wear dresses and then turns into a butch lesbian when she grows older

You are a lovely person to do this for a less fortunate family having a girl!

[myrainbowgirl]

Claire33, oh I am totally with you about the adult relationship. That's honestly much more important to me, too. But I definitely have missed buying fun girly stuff, and going shopping for all things girly was just wonderful!

[Claire33]

Will you be finding out gender this time around? FX for you!

[trifecta]

I think this is a good suggestion and a kind thing to do. I have a small stash of girl clothes I'll donate at some point (but not quite yet).

I've also thought about donating to a girl-centric charity like the ones that donate feminine hygiene products to girls in Africa so they don't have to miss school. I should actually do it.

[pink_bean]

I think this is an amazing thing to do! To be honest, I have personally wondered if I really want a daughter or just the chance to buy little baby girl things.
. This may seem shallow to some but through my GD I have come to realize that while I long for a baby girl, due to my terrible adolescence and difficult relationship with my mother I can not see beyond that. So, maybe if I just go crazy shopping for a baby girl it might help me to get it out of my system and see if it really does go deeper than that.

I think this is a very generous thing you have done and a great idea! trifecta I also like your idea about helping girls in Africa.

[myrainbowgirl]

Will you be finding out gender this time around? FX for you!

Yes, did MaterniT21 Tuesday, so will probably know in a week or so!

[Claire33]

Yes, did MaterniT21 Tuesday, so will probably know in a week or so!

Exciting, good luck!!

[myrainbowgirl]

For those of you who wanted to know, I found out I am having a little girl after 4 boys! Maybe the girl vibes I was getting doing all that girl shopping influenced things a little, lol!