Thread: Confused about family size
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October 17th, 2014, 07:29 PM #11
Going from 2-3 was my easiest transition. It was wonderful and natural and just all fell into place. I have 5 and am planning on having another one. Most of the comments above have echoed my thoughts on why I want a "big" family. To be surrounded by life and love and yes a little bit of chaos.
Thank you God and Our Lady
- 2005 - 2007 - 2010 - 2012 - 2013 - 2016
Due January 2021
Dec '12, Feb '13, July '15
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October 18th, 2014, 02:53 AM #12
What a lovely thread!! I am really looking forward to having three and your experiences made me smile!! Xxx
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October 18th, 2014, 04:24 AM #13
Hi Midwest, we were the same, we have 2 DDs and we were unsure of whether to try for number 3. Our DDs are close in age and it has been a relatively easy and fun journey for us so far. So when we finally decided to try for 3, we were always hoping for a boy, but had to accept that as far as nature goes, we had to be prepared and happy for a DD3. Once we did that we actually felt really comfortable moving forward with trying. We fell pregnant pretty quickly and found out we are having our DS in Jan. We are pretty excited that he is a boy, but I think that most importantly, we accepted that there was every chance we wld have a girl and wld be happy with that. Both our girls are so different and so wonderful, and I think that each little person that comes along, boy or girl, will bring something special of their own. As soon as we found out we were pregnant we just knew this baby was meant to be part of our family. We are all so excited, even DD2 who is still under 2yo loves chatting away to my belly! X
DD 2011
DD 2012
2014 TTC
DS due 2015
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October 18th, 2014, 04:26 AM #14Moderator
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Just a quick extra note on the over population guilt We have 10 so have added one or two extra's but I can honestly say that so far my brood has caused less of a carbon footprint than alot of 1 or 2 child families whose children are showered with everything brand new! My house is almost like the local recycling centre with everybody dropping off there 'old' clothes and toys, regularly with the labels still on! So just make sure that if you do feel bad about adding another one that you say to yourself that you are going to do it all secondhand and maybe even make sure to do things like holiday at home instead of foreign holidays and walk for the extra smaller journeys, your one little extra will most probably not make that much of a difference when compared to the massive damage that happens daily in the industries that are already running to keep us humans in the lazy lifestyles we have become dependant on!!
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October 18th, 2014, 05:13 AM #15Dream Vet
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I'm going to use 100% cloth nappies and breast pads if I get my DD and also upcycle old things to make into her clothes which should be alot of fun. I want to make a vegie garden too. I always fancied being an eco Mum but never had time with the twins so would love to go all out next time! I love what is good for the earth but is more about the money will be spending doing HT that I feel I need to make up for
DPs sons 21 +13 11 + our 6 4 year old identical twins!
I might actually be over my deep yearning for a and it's an exciting feeling
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October 19th, 2014, 03:51 AM #16
I can totally relate with you Midwest.
Pretty soon after I had DD2 I decided I'm fine with my family as it is and didn't think of a 3rd child until recently.
I know that it will be hard, especially now that my DDs are older and I have a more relaxed lifestyle then when they were toddlers.
Having a baby is a blessing, but also hard because it needs everything we have in us for the first years of its life. And I also stress over the possibility that it will be another girl. I wish I could convince my DH to go HT, but he is against it
But I know that if I don't at least try one last time I will always think back and regret it, whereas I will never regret a new baby even if it is my 3rd DD
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October 20th, 2014, 02:03 PM #17Swaying Advice Coach
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LOVE! I have looked into the "overpopulation" issue extensively (since we get tons of criticism because of our 5) and research is indicating that in many countries (the ones that most of us are from) the real issue within our children's lifetimes is going to be UNDERpopulation, not overpopulation. Lots of people aren't having the replacement level of children and in countries like Germany and Japan this is getting to critical levels.
Have you taken a look at the rest of your family to see if you really even are contributing to overpopulation?? I know that in my family, since the turn of the century, the number of people on the planet that are related to my husband and I either by marriage or genetics, has plummeted to practically nothing. So everyone looks at us and is all like, "ew, 5 kids" but it's like our family size overall is about 1/5 of what it was even a generation ago. His sister, my sister and her husband, his aunt and her spouse and his uncle, my stepmom's brother, and several of my great-aunts had/have NO kids (there were also several others I'll omit LOL because this is getting overly complicated) My grandpa adopted my dad as a baby when he married my grandma and they were unable to have kids together. Then my uncles, my brother, my grandma, my stepmom and several of our aunts/uncles, great aunts/uncles, cousins, etc only had one, as have several of our friends. So I am sorry I am just not buying that my family size has any bearing whatsoever on the world's population!!! We are a drop in the bucket of what we were 40 years ago!!!! Questions?? Check out the NEW and improved Complete Index !!!
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October 20th, 2014, 02:12 PM #18Swaying Advice Coach
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!!! Questions?? Check out the NEW and improved Complete Index !!!
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October 20th, 2014, 04:24 PM #19
Thanks for replies ladies! We're a pretty crunchy family, we BF, CD, & I obviously reuse all my kids stuff since my girls are only 2.5 yrs apart.
I feel this extreme guilt for wanting more kids. It's weird :/
A lot of these replies really has DH & I talking though. I don't think i want just 2 kids. I just need some CLEAR sign that having a 3rd is the right thing. Hoping i get it soon lol!*2009* *2012* hoping to add a BOY.
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October 21st, 2014, 06:33 AM #20
Well I think the main thing you have to ask yourself is how would you feel if you couldn't have a third? Could you live with that? Would you be happy? For me what it came down to is I absolutely can't see our family being complete with 2. I love the two we have so much and watching them together, interacting as a family, etc and I really want to add another child to the mix. Honestly I wouldn't mind adding two more to the mix but I'm having trouble enough convincing DH for #3 .
While I would prefer a girl I absolutely would love a boy just as much. I don't mind waiting a bit longer even though it isn't my "ideal spacing". Basically I just have a deep desire and feel in my heart that three would be beneficial for our family (for everyone not just me). Plus I live in Germany where the population is shrinking so that doesn't affect my choice.
I'm not sure where your guilt comes from- do you live in an area where everyone only has 1-2 children?Enjoying life with my crazy little DS1 2010: and DS2 2012:
Jan 15- Loss sway baby 12 wks
It's a boy!
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