Decision time! Should we have another baby?

[atomic sagebrush]

^^^ So true! At least once a day (and I'm sure it's because I'm immersed in it all day every day) I have this moment of cold horror when I stop to realize my Gosh if I'd have gotten what I wanted with my IG sway, I would never HAVE DS 4?? And he's just the most awesome and unique person, he's the child that is the most like me in appearance (my daughter looks like my husband) and I almost missed that!!!

[4blue2pink]

i love it <3 if you had got *her* then you wouldnt have HIM how amazing that he is the most like you too xx

[Jconger]

We were in the same boat. Having two daughters and both times wanting a boy, we said we would try once more. Well last month we found out we are having a third girl. My heart was broken, and three has always been my limit. However, I want a son so badly I think we will try once more. Four is by far larger than I had in mind for our family, but I also don't want to live wondering what if we tried once more. And that way there is no "middle" child. Two and two lol. I agree with everyone, I don't think there will be any disappointment in having another kiddo. Each one is so unique, brings so much love, and teaches us more about ourselves. Good luck to you as you listen to your heart.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[LMSM]

Sô so true, I could not imagine not having both of my girls and would never ever go back in time for a chance of a different child just to have a boy...they are and were meant to be and my heart stops at the simple thought of never having had either one of them as my child... I think that once there, each of them just belongs, not another, not another gender or character , just them.
Hope you can get that confidence in your decision, whatever and that may be, Mia...and am sure a third child would fit right in and be just as awesome as his or her sisters

[hopper]

Just have to jump in with my two cents worth Mia - after I had DS2 everyone thought I was done. I had wretched pregnancies and sure obviously I could only have boys so why bother - or that was what I got off most people anyway! Fast forward a year or so and I get pregnant on DS3. Now I did sway for him but God intended him for us and like Atomic said above, if I had gotten what I wanted I wouldn't have him and he is beyond special. He's almost one now and I'm back for another sway. I'm not desperate for that little girl like I was before DS3. I think with his arrival I found peace. Now obviously I would still like a daughter but if #4 is meant to be a son then I am blessed amongst men!!!
One other thing - when everyone was assuming I was done after DS2 I spoke with my friends mother. She told me that she had so many regrets over not having as many kids as she wanted. She had 3. Two boys followed by a girl but she said she wishes she hadn't listened to the naysayers and just had the family she wanted. Her husband had tried to adopt two children, a girl and a boy, from Chernobyl but it had all fallen apart and they were so heartbroken over it they never tried again. It just made me REALLY think - You never regret the children you have. Only the ones you don't.
Best of luck with your choice, though I think you've already made your decision xx

Sent from my EVA-L09 using Tapatalk

[MiaMelb]

We were in the same boat. Having two daughters and both times wanting a boy, we said we would try once more. Well last month we found out we are having a third girl. My heart was broken, and three has always been my limit. However, I want a son so badly I think we will try once more. Four is by far larger than I had in mind for our family, but I also don't want to live wondering what if we tried once more. And that way there is no "middle" child. Two and two lol. I agree with everyone, I don't think there will be any disappointment in having another kiddo. Each one is so unique, brings so much love, and teaches us more about ourselves. Good luck to you as you listen to your heart.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Oh wow Jconger, I'm really sorry your sway didn't go the way you were hoping. I hope this phase of initial disappointment fades quickly and you can have some time to really get excited about her arrival.

I'm sure you've probably mentioned this somewhere else but if you don't mind me asking are you happy with finding out before her birth? How did you go about finding out? I'm totally sure I'd burst into tears if they told me at a scan and I'd hate for someone else to see me like that.

[MiaMelb]

Just have to jump in with my two cents worth Mia - after I had DS2 everyone thought I was done. I had wretched pregnancies and sure obviously I could only have boys so why bother - or that was what I got off most people anyway! Fast forward a year or so and I get pregnant on DS3. Now I did sway for him but God intended him for us and like Atomic said above, if I had gotten what I wanted I wouldn't have him and he is beyond special. He's almost one now and I'm back for another sway. I'm not desperate for that little girl like I was before DS3. I think with his arrival I found peace. Now obviously I would still like a daughter but if #4 is meant to be a son then I am blessed amongst men!!!
One other thing - when everyone was assuming I was done after DS2 I spoke with my friends mother. She told me that she had so many regrets over not having as many kids as she wanted. She had 3. Two boys followed by a girl but she said she wishes she hadn't listened to the naysayers and just had the family she wanted. Her husband had tried to adopt two children, a girl and a boy, from Chernobyl but it had all fallen apart and they were so heartbroken over it they never tried again. It just made me REALLY think - You never regret the children you have. Only the ones you don't.
Best of luck with your choice, though I think you've already made your decision xx

Sent from my EVA-L09 using Tapatalk

Thanks hopper.

I'm not sure what has triggered it here over the last 10-15 years but it seems everyone has decided that you only have 2 kid families (I'm sure cost of living pressure in Aust has played a part among other things). I see all these 2 kid families around and just think if they've all decided to be done then that's what we're supposed to do. But I don't want to have regrets (if I can avoid it) and think I'll just have to give this swaying a go crack. Will probably start a light sway come November, amp it up to full on swaying in January with ttc starting April.

[kittendreams]

Thanks hopper.

I'm not sure what has triggered it here over the last 10-15 years but it seems everyone has decided that you only have 2 kid families (I'm sure cost of living pressure in Aust has played a part among other things). I see all these 2 kid families around and just think if they've all decided to be done then that's what we're supposed to do. But I don't want to have regrets (if I can avoid it) and think I'll just have to give this swaying a go crack. Will probably start a light sway come November, amp it up to full on swaying in January with ttc starting April.

This is what I see too! And if you talk about having 3 kids people look at you like you are crazy and that you couldn't handle it!
I know kids are expensive but I'd rather spend money on raising kids than having a new car every year and overseas holidays- having a bigger family is my dream why can't others just accept that we are all different. I just happen to like family more than possessions lol!

[hopper]

Thanks hopper.

I'm not sure what has triggered it here over the last 10-15 years but it seems everyone has decided that you only have 2 kid families (I'm sure cost of living pressure in Aust has played a part among other things). I see all these 2 kid families around and just think if they've all decided to be done then that's what we're supposed to do. But I don't want to have regrets (if I can avoid it) and think I'll just have to give this swaying a go crack. Will probably start a light sway come November, amp it up to full on swaying in January with ttc starting April.

I think it's the same here! Everywhere I look I see two child families and more often than not it's pigeon pairs. My DH and I have made the decision to not tell anyone we are planning one more child. It's not worth having to hear anyone else's opinion on the matter. I hope you get that son you desire (You can have all my blue dust - it has thus far produced 3 spectacular boys!) The HE diet seems to be so easy to follow nd the support you will get here Will be such a help! Best of luck xx

Sent from my EVA-L09 using Tapatalk

[Greydore]

You sound like me! I've actually taken a break from this site because I needed to convince myself that I'm done (obviously I'm back). I have two boys, 3 and 1. I struggle with depression, and it's been hard lately. I have little patience, plus the fact that I've never enjoyed playing with kids. Don't get me wrong, I adore my boys, but motherhood hasn't been easy for me. Despite all of this, I can't shake the desire for more. I'm only 28, so I have a hard time feeling done. On the other hand, I can't wait for amusement parks, less stressful vacations, and all the things that come with older children. Not sure I really want to start over. We recently went camping. All the kids 3 and up had a ball. I spent the trip following my 17 month old- making sure he didn't face plant into the fire, kept him from wandering into the woods, etc. It was not enjoyable. Do I want to do that again? I don't know. Such a hard decision!