I feel lost

[Justjessica]

I'm so sorry you are having to go through this. My heart goes out to you, it really does. I hope you get the support you need to get through this difficult time.

[onthepond]

Emmy, you and I are in very similar situations so I am SO SORRY for what you are going through - it has been a nightmare to us. Our baby last measured 8 weeks, 6 days, should have been just over 10. My dr did recommend me to have a D&C after talking through our options and I had one on Thursday. It actually went well (as well as one could go) and day by day I am trying to move forward. It has been 5 days now since we found out our baby is gone, but I am looking forward to the future and trying to get myself to believe that we will conceive again soon with a healthy baby that will stick.

I am thinking of you, knowing that this has been the hardest thing I have ever been through. I know it isn't an easy decision, but I went with the D&C because my body wasn't catching on, I couldn't handle the thought of passing my baby at home, and I was ready to move forward (while never forgetting this) to try again but you have to do what feels right for you...Good luck and take care of yourself! I am hopeful to see you in the TTC forums again soon.

[EmmyRoo]

Thanks onthepond, I am still waiting. I had a scan on Friday and they gave me another week, apparently my body is starting to realise and some progress has been made, but I'm still not bleeding. I am so scared of medical and surgical management I'm just hoping to miscarry naturally soon, although it feels so wrong to want that. It is total hell, limbo or a terrifying hospital experience, what kind of choice is that? This is the worst experience I've even been through, I just feel broken. I'm so glad I have my DSs, at least they give me reason to get up every day and carry on a "normal" routine. I really feel for those who have a mc with their first pregnancy, at least I know I can carry a baby to term, it makes believing that the next one will stick that bit easier. to you, it is an unbearable time for us both. I hope you feel better soon and catch an egg asap. X

[Dana-Alicia]

So sorry you're going through this I know there are some things you can do that might help you miscarry naturally. For example here: How to Have a Natural Miscarriage (No D&C) or maybe you can google some other options. I really hope this helps, hugs to you mama!

[onthepond]

Hang in there. I know how hard this is It breaks my heart that you, or any of us, have to go through this...but you are right about your son. I have a 16 month old daughter who is a great reminder each day that I can have a healthy baby and I believe in my heart of hearts that we will again, and hopefully sooner than later. How long are you going to wait to TTC again? Have you been able to think through that yet? I am still all over the place, but since 3 doctors have all told us just to wait through one period, it seems like they must believe that would be OK for us. We will see. Taking it one day at a time this time.

Keep us posted on how you are doing. I will say a prayer for you that things start happening soon. Take care of yourself. Thinking of you!

[EmmyRoo]

Thanks, that's really sweet of you. Well I'm still waiting, fully expecting nothing to have happened by Friday's scan so I'm now steeling myself for an ERPC which I feel is probably the better option after 3 weeks of limbo. I'm totally terrified of it and still desperately hoping to lose the baby naturally.

The thing that's keeping me going is thinking we'll TTC asap once this is over, I just want to be pregnant again. I was swaying pink though and the thought of going back on the diet is awful. I thought that was all over. However, I know in the future when the feelings are less raw, the longing for a DD will still be there so I'd regret not trying properly, iykwim? I'm considering a "laid back" sway, hoping that fate/mother nature/god feels I've been through enough and gives me a DD without me having to try too hard - if only it worked that way!

I've been on the TTC after a loss board recently, maybe I'll see you there!
X

[The Anchor]

So so sorry emmy...i'm there too...HUGS