Atomic last attempt at ttc any suggestions?

[Pbn3]

Hi Atomic
So cd1 today and I swore last cycle would be my last however I have one last cycle that will still fall in October AND this will be the last cycle that would give us a due date just before dh's 45th bday, I would have just turned 38 the month before. We both just dont want to go beyond this point, dh especially. I've been on le diet since March (ttc 5 cycles) but have cheated basically the entire 2ww of last 3 cycles. I dropped the fibre as you suggested last cycle. I also had 2 attemps at 2 days b4 o and day of o last cycle using a sperm safe lube. My previous 3 cycles to this were all day before o attempts, very first cycle 3 days b4 o. I was thinking of starting prenatals tomorrow (although both ds' s were conceived only taking FA until bfp) as maybe my body is just too old and tired and needs the extra help? My lt phase also dropped another day and was only 11 last cycle. Previous 3 cycles were 12, prior to that 13,14 consistently. I thought of going to see my gp but I cant imagine there'd be much she could do that would be beneficial in the maybe 10 day period after seeing her that I o. Its either going to happen or not and I'm not overly concerned about introducing boy friendly sway tactics at this point. My plan at this point is to start prenatals and time our attempts for day before o and day of o, I just don't think any earlier will be beneficial and would just decrease dh sperm quality for a closer attempt. I'd still have him release maybe every 3-4 days from now until close to attempt time. Just wondering if you think any differently regarding the prenantals (I'd rather not take them in all honesty I've had troubles swallowing even those tiny FA tablets) but I will find a way and just deal with if you think it could help boost my chances. Any other thoughts or ideas you have will be most appreciated. I know Rome wasn't built in a day and I wouldn't fall straight away, my ds' s were 4 & 6 months ttc however I'm alot smarter fertility wise now and thought nailing the timing was really going to help me achieve it quicker. We couldn't ttc any earlier as ds2 was a cs2 and I had no choice but to wait and now I'm out of time as such. Sorry for the long spiel but I'm emotionally drained plus I also think I get a hormonal imbalance when af starts that makes me susceptible to sadness, crying sometimes etc for a day or so (then I'm back to normal happy as Larry!). It started after af returned post ds2 so its not a new thing but I didn't want to be put on the pill or anything else etc as I knew I'd be ttc dc3. Thanks for reading and for any advice you can offer

[Pbn3]

Sorry just remembered to add I'm a pretty heavy coffee drinker as in 2-3 every morning. Should I reduce this to one or none ?? And as much as I've enjoyed it should I also ditch the alcohol? I'm happy to do so but I can't help but feel my girl sway is being ripped apart and after all this time I'm just going to end up doing exactly what I did when conceiving my boys except for the change in diet which as I said above has been nonexistent during last 3 cycles 2ww

[XXforhubby]

Hang in there sweetie! While we all don't have a crystal ball, I would like to pass along some friendly advice I learned from my experience TTCing and swaying girl this time around .

I too was always reworking things to my sway, making adjustments, and dropping things as time went on not conceiving. While I do think this is natural for us boy moms to try and control things, it's hard not to when there is a time limit on the amount of time we can TTC.

I would only do what you feel comfortable with and what FEELS right to you. Atomic will help you with this . Look deep within and make sure you are ok with an opposite with some of the changes you are contemplating.

I wish I would have enjoyed TTCing a little more with DH- towards the end it seemed like "work". I also wished I could have relaxed and let go a little more. I now see and understand the fruits between having a plan and micromanaging the outcome. I'm not saying you are doing these things- your post just triggered this retrospection within me .

I wish you a BFP and loads o baby dust to you !!!



DS1🏼, DS2, DS3 Jan. '16 I'll sway for a DD for my DH!!

[Pbn3]

Thanks xx! I think knowing in the back of my mind there was a time limit hasn't helped but its there and no point into deluding myself otherwise lol. I'm sure I'll be fine with another boy as I kinda think that's what I'd have regardless of swaying (like every other boy mum feels I suppose). In saying that I wanted to know that I at least tried iykwim . Feeling much better today mentally and emotionally that first day of af is always rough! Thanks for your message and wishing you a wonderful delivery - not too much longer now!

[atomic sagebrush]

Prenatals don't fix not getting pregnant for the majority of people. If you must take them then do it 3x a week rather than daily.

Day of O is not good odds of conception. I would have you have attempt 0-2 and O-1 for better chances of conception OR every 3 days plus one more attempt at pos OPK if that is too hard to figure in advance. Odds of conception on O day are less than half what they are on O-2 and O-1.

11 day LP is still plenty to conceive with, and just because your LP was short THIS month, doesn't mean it won't be back to normal next. If you haven't already then add in the full fat dairy, egg, salmon combo (but if you're really cheating that much I seriously doubt you need this and it was probably a one-off.)

i think you should add in female O for you and stay laying flat ALL night after BD.

Is this time limit coming from you or from DH?? I think if it's your idea, take a deep breath and a step back and think if you really want to completely close the door or keep the possibility just a teensy bit open. The pressure factor doesn't help you get pregnant.

[Pbn3]

Hi Atomic and xx! So after some deep thinking I've come to realise a few things and thought I'd write in to share in case my post heading draws in anyone thinking or going through similar.

Firstly, never write a post cd1 lol especially if you're prone to emotional imbalances around this time.

Secondly (and it became so obvious to me it was like a slap in the face ) let go of the things you can't control (when you o, what shift dh will be on and how are we going to bd etc etc) and focus on the things you can (diet and one attempt).

Thirdly - stop wondering why I'm not getting pregnant and have faith that I can (this was a biggie )

Lastly - stop sweating the small stuff. Example - my previous 3 x 2ww cheats. I still skipped breakfast and stuck to two meals, I couldn't overeat most times as my tummy wouldn't allow it and while I would've went over in protien and fat it would not have been as bad as my mind made out.

Finally, I'm going back to basics and my original sway plan - diet and one attempt at day before o. A plan that works for MY situation. No more multiple opk testing as I know now that my digi's give me a solid smiley the morning before day of o regardless of how many times I test during the day not wanting to 'miss' my surge. I'm going to trust that things will happen when they happen and we'll get the job done somehow when its time.

I'm sorry for wasting both your time with my original post but at the same time I also believe it either made or helped me reach this ah haaa! moment I use to hear Oprah say lol. So thank you both. And Atomic to answer your question about is it me or dh that is stressing the time limit I actually deep down know its me. As much as 'I think' he looked relieved after yet another bfn cycle and as many times he's asked me do I still want to do this I think its more that he wants his 'normal wife' back.

Thank you both again and I hope this will have a domino effect on anyone else that is where I was when starting this post.

[covered in blue]

[XXforhubby]

Hang in there sweetie! I think your plan is just what you need! I'm hoping and praying that you get your long awaited BFP!

I bet it feels good to have the heavy weight off your shoulders! Huge hugs honey !!


DS1🏼, DS2, DS3 Jan. '16 I'll sway for a DD for my DH!!

[atomic sagebrush]

I will just say this is the magic month - lots of long overdue BFP so hoping our luck continues a little longer for you PB.